Almost another week has passed in this journey of a lifetime. Good to be home, but also very hard. The surgery has been so much more debilitating than I anticipated – I’m not sure what I expected but it’s very tricky.

My right arm is incredibly sore. It’s difficult to move it much, and my skin from the upper side of my chest, continuing in my armpit and down the inside of my arm feels like intense sunburn. As the nerves are recovering it feels like electric shocks and shivers in my arm. My skin is numb over my right shoulder blade and down the back of my right arm.  The wound across my chest where once there was boob is about 21cm/8 inches long. That’s healing well and in itself doesn’t hurt. At the moment I’ve got seroma going on just above the wound, which is a fluid build up. It was drained on Thursday (needle directly in, ouch, and several syringes full later it was flat again) but it’s built up again and is really swollen and tender. I’m sleeping sitting up as it’s the only comfy way to be, so the sleep isn’t great and I need to rest more as I am so so tired, but I’m not very good at it.

Since more of the nails on my left hand have been lifting off (more than on my right) I’ve been avoiding using my left hand for things that may catch my nails, but now I can’t really use my right so I’m having to risk it with my left which is making my nails worse – frustrating! I can’t do anything practical for Tilly like get her dressed, pick her up etc. but I can do other stuff with her, like reading and puzzles, so it’s not all bad.

Oh, and another jolly thing, I seem to have picked up something while I was in hospital – ringworm. Before you recoil, it’s not anything wormy but a skin condition. It seems to be a mild case so far and I’m hoping by treating it quickly it’ll disappear soon enough. But man, this is something I could do without right now.

Tilly’s been asserting herself loudly this week, seemingly to punish me for leaving her last week. Mum was here all last week to help – amazing – but Tilly didn’t give her an easy time either, as perhaps when Granny’s here mummy goes. Dan, however, seems to have remained golden boy – humph! Well at least someone is. She has been nervous of me leaving her with someone else, even for an hour, which is really unlike her. We’re hoping she’ll settle down once she realises I won’t be going away for days at a time again. Dan is away for 3 days next week, so we’ll see what Tilly makes of that! Mum is coming back for the week so we can enjoy Tilly’s comments on the situation together.

Dan’s been carrying on, carrying on and getting back into work. He’s had a tough week, topped off by realising last minute he had a work commitment in London on Thursday which meant he couldn’t come to my surgery follow-up appointment, which was disappointing for all of us.  And it won’t be easy being away for most of next week but we’ll all be ok. He’s managing to keep everything going but feels a little lost within this whole circus.

What a gloomy post! Well that’s how it is sometimes. It’s been a long couple of weeks and it feels like two steps forward, one step back. Things are improving but slowly and set backs seem to pop up . For example, the pain has been improving then with the increase in seroma it’s got worse. But we’re only 12 days on from surgery and I’m so much better than last week. On the whole we’re going in the right direction and long may it continue.

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